It was a hectic morning, mostly my fault. The alarm went off at its usual time, but I just couldn't bring myself to get out of the bed. 15 minutes later the alarm went off again and I sprung out of bed. We did our usual morning routine, but now we were 15 minutes behind schedule. I prepared Ava's lunch and placed her lunchbox on the counter. We got our coats on and rushed out the door. As soon as we got on the highway, it hit me that I had left Ava's lunchbox on the counter. Fortunately, I knew Chris hadn't left for class yet so I called him quickly and asked that he drop it off on his way to work. Crisis adverted! Whew!
We pulled into Ava's school carpool, and I turned and apologized that mommy had forgot her lunch and explained that daddy would bring it by. Ava just said "okay!" I thought to myself "well, that went well." I walked around and got Ava out of the carseat only to be welcomed by the saddest face. I gave her a squeeze and apologized once again and assured her that daddy would bring her lunchbox before lunch time. Ava didn't want to budge so I decided to carry her to the door to give her a little more assurance that everything was going to be okay. I explained to her teacher the issue and she also assured Ava that mommy was taking care of it. Ava finally lifted her head and gave a little smile and went on into class. Sigh, I walked back to my car and my eyes filled with tears.
This particular day was one of those days where you feel like you're the worst parent in the world. I know this seems like a minor issue but it's not the first time I've dropped the ball. You plan and you prepare. You try your best to be on top of things but sometimes you just feel so worn out and no matter what you do you feel like you can't do anything right. Have you been there?
Fast forward to later that day when I picked up Ava. I got out of our car and headed to the gate and before I got there I heard the happiest squeal followed by "MOMMY!" Talk about turning around your day! Ava gave me the biggest hug and showed me that daddy had brought her lunchbox. She told me she had the best day playing with her friends Rob and Maci. Tears again filled my eyes but this time they were happy tears. I knew all was forgiven and I got to try again.
I said all of this to say this....First, there is no such thing as the "perfect" parent. It's something I have to daily remove from my thought bank. So let that notion go!!! Second, a reminder I received from my sister a few months back that God chose YOU to parent your child or children. Everything it'll take to raise and guide your child is within YOU already. Through God's grace and strength you can be the best parent to your child even with your weaknesses.
I'd like to leave you with a few scriptures that I quote when I'm having a hard time and need a reminder that with God's strength I can do this thing called parenthood.
Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about you. 1 Peter 5:7.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Proverbs 3:5
Be still, and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10
For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, "Do not fear, I will help you." Isaiah 41:14
He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Isaiah 40:29
For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13
